


After You

by i_write_for_my_friends



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Light Angst, kellam's had bad separation anxiety forever & tharja gets him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-13
Updated: 2016-09-13
Packaged: 2018-08-14 19:36:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8026360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_write_for_my_friends/pseuds/i_write_for_my_friends
Summary: “Yes.” A pause in her words and footsteps caught the Ylissean off guard momentarily, stopping himself in his tracks until she began to walk again. “At first, it was curiosity, plain and simple. You seemed to disappear at will without any means of sorcery. I was intrigued. Honestly, I didn’t even know of you before you literally materialized in front of my face.”





	After You

All of the Shepherds whispered about her when she initially joined.

 

Easy on the eyes, she had more curves than a river, and her attire flaunted them for any to see. A cape hid her scantily clad bottom that a select few of the bachelors commented heartily on. Plegians had bodies, and by hell did they know how to display them. She wore her black hair down; save for two tiny pigtails, and her choppy bangs draped over her eyes, casting a shadow on them and giving her a dark appearance.

The soldiers that had the chance to speak with her all had nothing pleasant to say. _“She’s nuts,”_ told his green cavalier friend.  _“I gave her some of my food just to make her feel welcome, because, y’know, the rumors are pretty bad. The next day, she tells me she cursed me! If I tell a single lie, I’m_ dead! _And it won’t be painless!”_

 _“Stahl! Why didn’t you fucking tell us this sooner!? Where is that bitch, she’s not allowed to kill_ anybody _here, that’s MY job if you chumps fall outta line!”_

After the two restrained the red cavalier and calmed her down enough to accept Stahl’s less than perfect excuse, she sat back down, rubbing her temples and the other two knights knew what that meant. They looked at another once before she continued, in a calmer but still tense voice.

_“Stahl, you steer your ass clear from her if she enters the room. Same as you, tin man. Out of sight. Think you can handle that?”_

_“I’ve been handling that for years. I doubt she knows I even exist.”_

 

When two years passed, the knight reflected on that conversation and thought about how utterly wrong his prediction on the future was.

It started with mail, and then a snide remark. She turned to him, casting an icy glare that shook his spine enough to cease his rambling. _“Why are you still here?”_

In truth, he didn’t have an answer for her. If he’d just kept his mouth shut, she would’ve never seen him in the first place, thus saving him from this situation. Before he could offer an excuse, she was nowhere to be seen.

 

Now they strode side-by-side, regardless of the hour or occasion. Now, she listened intently to his words, expressing her interest and opinions with what he had to say. Now when she threatened to curse him, it could be as something silly as seeing double Chroms everywhere, or something so risqué that he didn't dare repeat it in his head. Her face was visibly softer when it was just them two, and he never again worried about being alone or forgotten.

Silences between them were never awkward. Neither being blessed with communication skills, they instead welcomed the quiet if it came. Their only concern was being together, and if not for giving the transparent knight a presence, the others would have shown concern for spending too much time with their significant other.

It was hard for him to believe the things he’d heard being said about her in the past. What he had heard versus reality contrasted too greatly. He caught a glimpse of the tiny Plegian who was all the wiser and knew he nervously shifted to the far out expanse of the field. She puffed out air that pushed her bangs out of her downcast face to let him aware that she wasn’t delighted.

Her signal of malcontent sounded like a sturdy branch snapping in his ear, making him flinch like he’d been struck with one half of it on his back. “Tharja..?” He muttered, watching her carefully. He’d also forgotten just how intuitive she was when it came to her relationships.

“Being unheard is your talent, I know that. But I thought we went over that you’re not supposed to hide anything from me.” Her eyes couldn’t be seen from the harsh shade from her hair, but he knew that underneath the darkness there was an insecure girl that only needed the truth. The knight considered his words carefully before opening his mouth to give her an answer.

“Sorry, I was just thinking to myself.”

When he saw her now looking up at him, it indicated what he’d given her wasn't adequate. “Sorry, sorry.” A sigh later, he turned away from her again, trying to put together a sentence that wouldn't upset her. “I don’t know. I guess I was just thinking about how you treat others, to put it frankly.”

“I see.” The conversation went stiff and Kellam would’ve allowed it to die if he didn’t instinctively clench his fist when the pressure on his chest tightened. He’d thought back on the horror his friend spoke with when he was at the mercy of her hex, and how his other friend demanded that he not even look in her direction. He thought about how if she wasn’t in his line of sight now how fast it would take for him to panic.

“These people are our friends, I just...I’ve been wondering why you can be cruel...to some of them...I guess…” When he trailed off, palm resting on his neck, she absorbed what he said like she hadn’t heard it hundreds of times prior.

“I’m a dark mage. Being callous and cruel is my talent.”

The neutrality and indifference in her tone made her statement feel forced and rehearsed. Perhaps if he was anyone else he would’ve accepted her reply, but he learned early on how to detect a lie from her. She must’ve realized he wouldn’t be fooled that easily anymore, and she stared straight ahead, not daring to blink even for a minute.

“Tharja, I know that’s not why. You don't have to tell me your reasoning, but I don’t appreciate being lied to, either.”

Still she remained quiet for a moment, and Kellam began counting the steps they were taking. Still nothing came from her lips, and soon the Plegian locked her eyes on a tree she judged was at least a mile from their location. What she had to say escaped as nothing bigger than her regular speaking volume, but it wasn’t small enough to be a whisper either. “I don’t want to talk to anyone, and I want to be feared by everybody. By being mean, I can kill two birds with one stone.”

Being feared by all made logical sense. All dark mages were frightening and eccentric people. Keeping everyone on their toes left her in an advantageous position, and it definitely made them avoid contact with her. It also made sense with her poor ability to socialize that she would hide herself away.

However, the disadvantage to that was the heinous gossip that swarmed around her name. The kind of gossip that kept him up some nights, even as her head was on his chest, and her arm held onto his waist tightly so he had no intent of abandoning her. It was the kind of gossip that made him so furious just thinking about how he did nothing to end it after he’d gotten to meet the real Tharja, not the one everyone made her out to be.

“I’m sure...you know that the rest all talk about you, and what they have to say...isn’t nice at all,” Kellam swallowed hard when the woman appeared unphased, remaining the same as she was a minute ago when explaining her anti-social behavior.

“I figured, and I figured I didn’t care as long as you didn’t believe any of it.”

The pair grew quiet again, and Tharja colder with every step. Her movements looking as practiced as her lie, like she’d taught herself how to be socially acceptable just for him. Watching her struggle to appear normal and act like basic human emotions were so far below her was as horrid as the first time his family had forgotten his birthday, and yet, he was sure nobody else would’ve noticed how frail she was on the inside.

“You...didn’t believe any of them?” Clearing her throat stifled the crack in her voice and it only made Kellam more sorrowful for her, for unintentionally leaving her question open-ended. Doubt washed through him in a single wave, but if he had given into any of nonsense the Shepherds fabricated about her, then he never would’ve spoken to her two years ago. He never would’ve made his existence known to her.

“...No. I wasn’t going to judge you until I met you myself.”

A small, satisfied smile was seen underneath the layers of her choppy bangs. Gripping her tattered tome to her chest, the knight couldn’t help but beam right along with her. “It’s not healthy to blindly trust strangers. Your kindness may one day be your undoing, quiet man.”

“Is that why you follow me around and refuse to let me out of your sight?” Though he laughed in jest, it was a question that stumped him for nearly a year. She’d never given him a solid explanation (not that he asked her often), and all of his scrupulous analyzing to better understand her and who she was proved to be of no use.

“No.”

“Do you...have a reason?”

“Yes.” A pause in her words and footsteps caught the Ylissean off guard momentarily, stopping himself in his tracks until she began to walk again. “At first, it was curiosity, plain and simple. You seemed to disappear at will without any means of sorcery. I was intrigued. Honestly, I didn’t even know of you before you literally materialized in front of my face.”

“Ah, y-yeah. S-sorry, about that.” Memories returned him to that evening, when she gasped so loudly that if she were just a little more shocked, she would’ve screamed and swung to defend herself. Mortifying then, as she threatened to transform him into an amphibian, now he felt foolish for not realizing how empty they were.

“Thanks, for finding me interesting, I guess. Sorry for not uh, living up to your expectations,”

“Kellam,” came her chafing, chiding criticism. “You always speak out of turn before allowing me to finish. I said your gift was the first thing that sparked my interest. It isn’t the last.” Her hand was at his scarf with such alarming speed that he wasn’t aware of it until it ran down the ridges of cloth. Something indescribable about her intimate assertion was wildly alluring, even if he had no idea how or why. Maybe he was under a spell this whole time; that she _did_ curse him like she had with the rest, or _maybe,_ he thought; the spell he was under was completely of his own mind and will.

She had mentioned in the past that she didn’t believe in using magic to brew love.

“What attracts me to you now is the same that I’ve felt for myself: You’ve been alone.”

The dark mage would take note to employ eye contact when she needed sincerity the most. He took in her dark irises that raced at sudden shifts he made so that he wouldn’t fade from her sight. Her prolonged staring that uneased any other victim turned out to be a perfect remedy for finding the invisible man that floated aimlessly who once had hoped one day after the next, that his company would remember he was real and still among them.

“You deserve isolation far less than I, but after watching how everybody around us failed to acknowledge your presence, I made it my job to look after you. You’ll never be alone for as long as you live.”

Without a second thought, his palms were reaching for her hand that touched him so feintly, holding it in both of his, fanning her fingers out as she allowed him to play with them.

“That’s the sweetest thing anybody has ever said to me. Thank you.”

When his lover made up her mind, there was no going back. He could already feel that she would stay true to her word and never break her oath. He would never admit it aloud, but conditioning himself to grow used to being forgotten developed crippling separation anxiety in him he thought too strong to manage a romantic relationship. Finding a partner that would accept his liability seemed next to nothing, but here was a woman that against all of the odds, loved him for exactly who he was.

Pulled in for a long embrace, she let out a long, worn out sigh when he buried his face between her neck and hair. They stood for a while, feeling security in the familiarity of the other, and Kellam couldn't help but to break the silence with a laugh. _They were the weirdest couple he’d ever seen_ , and yet, imagining himself with anyone even slightly different from her was impossible. He wouldn’t want love in any other way, shape, or form.

  
But mostly, he was glad that she found him.


End file.
